I would tell a liar that their pants are on fire, but it’s much more fun to watch them burn…

Nick considered himself very smooth when it came to women, and I believe he thought he was much smarter than me since he was a few years older. Technically speaking he was a “cheap thrill” guy that I mistakenly put in the  category of “openly dateable” guy.
He was a habitual liar, and still is, I’m sure. I’m also sure he was used to dating very gullible women, which I am not.

I was just getting home from a coffee with a friend and Nick was supposed to come by so we could hang out for a bit. This is the first time I caught him outright lying. It was over text message, involved my friend Hanna and perfect timing;

Me – “Hey, I’m home now, so whenever you want to come over…”
Nick- “Cool, I’m just writing a paper at home, I’ll be maybe another half an hour”
Me – “Of course, take your time”

Hanna – “Hey, I’m at my friend Bill’s house and that guy Nick that you’re seeing is here”
Me – “Are you sure? He just told me he was writing a paper at home.”
Hanna – “Positive, he’s sitting beside me”
Me – “Excellent. I’ll have a funny story for you later. I’ll call you.”

Nick – “Almost done! Last Paragraph!”
Me – “Excellent”
Nick – “Ok, I’m just leaving my house; I’ll be there in about 15”
Me – “Can’t wait!”

When Nick got there I was very happy to see him, we sat on the couch and I made sure he sat at the end, against the arm of the couch. We chit chatted for a few minutes, then I said;

“I want you to know, I like you, and the only thing that’s really important to me is honesty. As long as you’re always honest with me, everything will be good.”

Without missing a beat he said;
“I agree, there’s nothing worse then lying, I would never do that. I could never lie.”

At this point he had made it too easy. So I smiled said “excellent” and gave him a kiss. I was sitting beside him, so I put both of my legs over his; effectively trapping him between the arm of the couch and myself.

“So” I said, “what was your paper on?”
“uuuhh, nothing important, it’s boring stuff” he replied.
“I’m interested.”
“Medical chemistry stuff” he said
“Ooo that is boring. I’m happy you were able to finish though.”
“Yeah, I wish I could have come over sooner”
“Me too.”
I gave him another kiss and then said;
“I know what I was going to tell you! Funniest thing; my friend Hanna, is friends with your friend Bill. I actually think you may know Hanna. You were sitting beside her tonight.”

He turned white as a ghost and he had no where to go. The only regret I have is not taking a picture of the look on his face with my phone. The thing that scares guys is when you keep a calm nonchalant attitude during a moment like this, they expect you to yell at them and get emotional. When you don’t they can’t read you and have no idea what’s going through your head (although I’m positive no one really wants to know what goes through my head). I told Nick that it would be wise if he left.

I didn’t care that he was at his friend’s house, but liars make me angry. And it really was an unbelievable amount of fun for me.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s